In reality, the chances that a relationship between a 14 year old and an adult is healthy and consensual are slim to none, and would be classified as rape or other abuse in all states. Even though it is unlikely that Christian had the emotional maturity to make a conscious, informed decision to engage in kink, what I find even more problematic is Anastasia’s way of interpreting Christian’s story: she refuses to accept his version, is convinced that he was abused by his mother’s friend, and decides that this abuse causes him to be unable to enjoy “normal” sex. This perpetuates the popular myth that BDSM is often (or even usually) a way of coping with or acting out childhood abuse or sexual assault.
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